Stuff #18: New Beginnings.

Last week was bad.  Not a terrible, everything that could go wrong did go wrong sort of a week.  It wasn't a generally miserable week.  It wasn't even a week filled with mediocre things.  I had a great time with friends, I got along with my husband, things went well.  But it was still bad.

It was bad in a personal sense.  The things that involved other people, those went alright. But the things I was doing just for me, those failed right and left.  I didn't exercise as much as I had said I would.  I didn't eat as well as I said I would.  I didn't clean as diligently as I said I would.  And, perhaps most important to this forum, I didn't update my blog as frequently as I said I would.  So, looking back on the week, some things went well, but a lot of things just failed.

I think that's because all these things were just for me.  And this past week, I wasn't an important enough reason to do things.  I wasn't a motivation to exercise, clean, eat healthy, and blog.  After all, I was the one that was tired and didn't want to do these things.  Clearly, if I'm doing it for me and I don't want to then I shouldn't.

Ok, that wasn't clear at all, and a rather convoluted sentence to boot.  But I think you get the idea.

Now, here's the thing I forgot about last week...I'm not just doing it for me.  There is a bigger reason to do these things, and it's God.  I forgot, last week, that he cares.  Structure and discipline are good, but they aren't enough without a reason.  I was trying to get everything done with my own energy, with no bigger picture.  That = recipe for failure.

Again, I know, that to some people this will make sense right away, and to some people it won't.  But God really does care about the little fiddly things in my life, and he wants me to do well.  When I exercise, it's not just to keep in shape, it's also so that I have the ability to do what He's got planned for me in the future.

All this thought doesn't mean a darn thing if I've already failed though.  If I had one chance, I've already blown it.  I don't have one chance though.  Last week isn't this week, and I've got a chance to start over again.  We normally tend to think in years, but every moment is a chance to do things right this time.  And even if I don't do it right, hopefully I'll do it better than last time.  Fail in the right direction.  After all, each new moment is a new beginning. 

I wouldn't be surprised if I'm not the only one whose week didn't go as planned, who maybe didn't disappoint anyone else, but is very down on themselves.  I don't think I'm the only one who watched goals whoosh past them, who made an effort but not nearly enough of one.

Good news, everyone who is in the same boat as me.  It's a new moment, a new week.

Here's to this week.  May it be better than last.